I met her not knowing how hard I'd fall. It was 3 months and 1 day ago when we smiled at each other, a month and 17 days ago when we started our relationship, 7 days ago when I messed it up, and 48 hours ago when I last heard from her.
All I wanted was peace in my soul and to rid myself from the scorn of a past love. When I finally let it go and had it affect my relationship, it went into the spiral of something that I didn't want to happen: a breakup. I tried to explain it and make amends...I can only think that it is all too late...
I don't know how I can recover my heart if I keep scaring myself out of great relationships...my committment goes awry and I know now that I do have issues with long-term things.
Permanence and leaving things in the control of another is a fear of mine. One habit I definitely have to get over. I want fate to lead me, and if I do, I'll be happier and more successful. Cherishing moments of the now will keep me happy.
I only hope the one I am definitely and truly in love with knows that I still love her and want nothing more than to be happy...
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