[25 Jul 2007 | Wednesday]
[08 Jul 2007 | Sunday]
[24 Jun 2007 | Sunday]
[17 Jun 2007 | Sunday]
[14 Jun 2007 | Thursday]
[04 Jun 2007 | Monday]
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rejuvenated 
pleased 
awake 
drunk 
okay 
discontent 
grateful 
giggly 
crazy 
amused 
hungry 
groggy 
geeky 
drained 
busy 
blank 
blah 
chipper 
creative 
optimistic 
restless 
loved
[14 May 2007 | Monday]
 | 5:18 PM - A whole lotta THANK YOU'S... Aside from everything that's happening in my life...I just wanted to let everyone who has been able to say anything to help me out...I THANK YOU...and for those that I haven't yet called...I will call soon... I have really thought over the many things that have been going on and taken into account what everyone has said... Also.....just an FYI... It's also hard knowing that some of the mistakes I've made gotta go, and the price I've been paying is something that I will have to deal with.... Darn that coffee that God gave me...but it surely makes me see with my eyes wide open!! Thank you EVERYONE!! |
thankful
[11 May 2007 | Friday]
| 11:02 PM - Freaking Society...And the girl I'm still falling for... As hours went into days, then days into weeks nice..." (and to the GOD HONEST TRUTH...I RESPECT WOMEN...I don't treat them like a piece of meat...I really do give LOVE AND RESPECT...especially, ESPECIALLY, when I really REALLY LIKE THEM...) |
| 2:49 PM - If GOD gave me coffee... Through God's force and mysterious ways, I am finding myself knowing that I'm going in the wrong direction....I don't deserve much except to find myself through this wreckage and find the final place of where I belong... I am at a turning point....again....in my life... I can't run around in circles anymore...nor can I ignore the fact that I know that I will be suffering much just to do the right thing... But...In the end...it will turn out that way...the GOOD WAY...The GREATEST WAY I SHALL EVER FIND... I watched a movie online today..."C.R.A.Z.Y." and dealing with soo many things that I reflected in my life...and I'm still in the effort to find that peace....However, it reminded me of the "Footsteps in the sand" story and my qualms of embracing my Lesbianism and Spirituality all at the same time... I can't sort out another reason why at this moment I feel like I do: at my fork in the road... All I know is that I just want to find myself and listen to what my heart feels...and right now...at this moment... My heart isn't in its humble place...and it's hurting because it doesn't know where to turn to get out of the mess that I've put upon my heart... Thus... "If God gave me coffee, this is certainly my wake-up call."
PS - Oh yeah...and and FYI: I broke down crying today just realizing all of this...it's miraculous what happens when you find yourself thinking about things that you wish were a bit more better...
|
[07 May 2007 | Monday]
| 7:08 PM - Wasting Gas... I am soo full of it... I can't believe I went out driving again....Damnit....gonna waste gas...I'm ending up finding myself more lonely...I didn't get to do much today....how sad... (~_~') OH well....there is always another day...(^_^)v Ferlyn |
[01 May 2007 | Tuesday]
| 3:06 AM - To My Only Exception... Now I'm in a pickle I can't help but notice And she said, "No" to me earlier, I found myself holding back I know I have all that charm as hell I couldn't help but notice it So for you, |
weird
[25 Apr 2007 | Wednesday]
| 5:49 PM - Finding my Older Blogs... If you ever need to find my older blogs...on the Left of this screen should be a box with "Blog Archive" and you just click "Older" and it will take you to each past five blogs prior to the last archive... If you have NO CLUE what I just said...just read the blog I just posted...it more than enough states stuff of what's currently happening in my life.... I just only hope that if you, as my readers, have the opportunity to reread my blogs, because they actually prove a bit of a point especially when it comes to my current ordeal at the moment... By the way....In the blog I just posted, the whole thing is still a "good moment" because I succeeded in preventing myself from getting into drama all over again.... But yeah...all off-topic.....JUST READ ON! (especially my past blogs...if you haven't already...) |
nerdy | 4:26 PM - Something Old for Something New... So as life has its moments...Good ones (Like the one I'm about to say now...), Bad ones (Like my whole Spring Break week...), and Ugly/Weird ones (Like that Crazy Voicemail Msg...in my previous blog before this one...)...There are many things that have been handed to me in moments of my life....and I think this one is a good one...a REALLY GOOD ONE... For my current Good Moment: When I felt alone during that one epiphany (in "Went to Pick up my First Car" Blog)....there was a reason for why i felt such way...I didn't know what I was going to do without someone in my life to love....or even lust over.....because when it came down to it (and as much of a whore I am...lol....j/k.....not really :P lol...)...I really didn't have anyone I was interested in or even yearned or desired over....it was SURREAL to me....I usually almost "always" have someone who I know I would feel any attraction towards...but this time I didn't...once I had to move on from some of the drama over that spring break...I just felt like my passion/desire was ripped from me and I couldn't feel anything anymore...it didn't feel the same...AND NOT EVEN an ounce of Sexual Animalistic Desire came from within me for ANY WOMAN...even if a REALLY HOT one walked past...it was just UNBELIEVABLE...especially that I could not have ANY slight desire over any woman...I just couldn't picture myself doing ---.....(hmmm....let's just leave that censored for now).... And NOW...after the shock of it and getting used to the fact that I was without my sexual urges or even Crush/Love urges...(and mind you, my Sexuality is very very fluid...)...it's actually nice feeling kinda, sorta "Celibate"...in a way...I guess more of my focus should come with that....and it's just weird....where a couple of months prior, I used to say that "Lesbians are tempted too"....I think I finally have a bit of a breather where I can clear my mind and not think about sex, women, and some of the sexual power I know i hold (lol....j/k about that one...)..... Anyway, as intriguing and as much sexual innuendo is spilling over in my blogs as of this moment....I can only have you, as my readers, understand that I am a result of more than just what the eye beholds...not to brag or boast soo much...but I do have a love life...a sex life...and a life life as well.... Here in turn is my Philosophy: My Three "L"s - Love, Lust, and Life It is just weird because as much as I would like to say that I have all three....I only have one at the current moment....which is my "Life," or in other words, my personal space and freedom to help define myself and create a foundation of the "me," develop a better "me," and/or even make mistakes to reinvent "me"....as for this moment....I am in the reinvention of myself...thus, without a "Love" life and without a "Lust" life...yet... However...tables have been turning again...and...At this turn of the moment....especially since Thursday...as I may have promised myself before "IWNGIWSW (I Will Not Get Involved With Straight Women),"....alas, that temptaion has arisen again....and as I was about to tell her....and actually "Crush" on someone...again....when I promised "never NEVER AGAIN!!"....I still kinda made it out that I would make exceptions to the rule.... From my previous blog "Another Dream....Oh GOODNESS...." it goes like this for what reminds me of what I should be doing: (Also look into the underlined, bolded writing that I emphasized...) "-I know my crush is straight: implied by the associations she has...she never actually admitted..however, I haven't seen her take a liking to any guys that I have seen...but case-in-point...It's under my best interest that I should naturally assume that ALL WOMEN are straight...to be on the safe side of "Lesbian Abstinence"...LOL...aww... :( how sad...I don't want to be an ABSTINENT LESBIAN DAMINT!! And in my quote I indicated: "...there I had to deal with the identity crisis of my ex-lover-who-was-a-straight-women-who-gave-me-an-exception-to-the-rule....so why me?? what is in me that attracts straight women? It would be nice to know so that I can prevent that from happening...because I don't need that drama..." I can put this as something that I should really look into BEFORE I get myself into a WHOLE LOT OF TROUBLE... Now....I don't think I actually indicated anywhere in my blogs about my exceptions to the rule of "IWNGIWSW"...however the only exceptions would be this: As much as all of what has happened, since Thursday...I still remember that...as much hope as I would possibly have for this girl to like me back...would it even be a long-term thing?? Or would it even be something and not a dramatic phase again?? Because....that's what I'm looking for...and I can't commit unless I know that is something of a factor....or even a possiblity in their eyes.... As much as I want things to happen....I know that right now....it's too soon to know....which is one of the reasons why I didn't say the "I like you"....(and if you're reading this...you should know who you are...)...because....I know what trouble it would get me into...and I know that the cycle would get into it again.... Only question for me now is...."WHY THE HELL AM I THINKING ABOUT A STRAIGHT WOMAN AGAIN!?!?!?"....AUUGGGH DAMNIT.....I know my drama persists in my efforts to just love and love and love and love and love and love and love, and ecetera.....however, why do make exceptions?? Because I know that there are those times that happen to people....where they find that "forever" in a place where most lesbians forbid themselves from entering...especially when it's the #1 Lesbian RULE in the book: Never get involved with a straight girl! Damnit (~_~').....More of me just gets tangled in my own webbing....so I'll just stop...and start acting weirder than usual...not hang around her as much...and try and forget about the things I have been thinking and forget about what I had said....because, in reality....she already said it in her actions last night....so why even bother?? Bottom line/Moral of my story (To "morally justify" for myself): : : : Or do they??? GRRR... : Just Remember the moral of this story: Straight women don't fall for Lesbians. |
numb
[18 Apr 2007 | Wednesday]
| 6:28 AM - Do I have enemies??? and this Crazy Voicemail Msg... So Today, 18 April 2007, at 12:02pm, I get this missed call and a voicemail msg threatening me to stay away from their friends or else they will "Fuck me up..." Hmmm... When I heard this msg, I was just thinking..."Who the hell would hate on me??" I don't make enemies...and I know I don't have any...plus...the only conflict I know that I have out there right now is the whole EAN-CG thing... NO WHERE ELSE DO I HAVE PEOPLE THAT WANNA "FUCK ME UP..."......LOL...It's kinda sad because I don't hang around many people...SOO..it should be easy enough to figure out who's really on my back... Soo....who is it? Well for one thing.. (I'm still trying to trace that voice...it's a girl for sure...sounds around after HS years...)
Well whatever the conclusion... WHY BE MAD??? I'm not a bad person...I'm actually VERY LIKEABLE...and it is hard to push my buttons and try and make something within of me go into a fit of rage...I think it is just a waste of time, energy, and thoughts to just deal with it...This isn't something I'm even afraid of... NOR AM I NAIVE...I can simply just call my cell phone provider to get the trace of the call because it was threatening...and File a police report too... Didn't you know you can do that? It's pretty easy...plus...whomever left that msg....has NO IDEA who they're messing with....don't get at me when I'm mad or I'll go all up in a rage on your ass....and maybe even send you to a night in prison...or just kill your ass (depending on how much you can make me mad) and then have people wonder what happened to the body...and I'm NOT kidding... NOW....if whomever the girl that really wants to fuck me up can just come out of the cowardness and stop frontin'....COME OUT NOW AND TRY TO BEAT ME UP!! I got a whole mess of sisters, soon-to-be brothers/sweethearts, friends that wouldn't like your attitude....nor would my family....and My Family's huge too....they'd come out here to "Fuck you up" too... LMAO....I'm glad I got something exciting in my life...it's fun...but try and mess with me and really REALLY GET ON MY BAD SIDE...YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHO YOU'RE FUCKING WITH!! One of the reason's I went to anger management for years...and why I'm soo "gleeful" now....is because...being mad isn't something I wanna waste my time with...it's whole mess of drama that I don't deal with...BUT...DO YOU WANNA GET ME MAD?? GO AHEAD...and you prolly won't see the light of day...because when I go out on a rage...I know what I'm capable of and even then, people end up barely alive or scarred for life...and that's my THREAT... HOWEVER...you wanna talk this out? I will....I don't use violence...but if it has gotta come down to that...I will defend myself to the fullest extent..and it just made me mad finding out that I someone would wanna threaten me...IF YOU DO THREATEN ME...there are consequences to your actions if you try to do this to me....I've been ridiculed before...and I don't take that lightly anymore... |
irate
[07 Apr 2007 | Saturday]
| 12:58 AM - Went to pick up my first car... I finally have a car....YAY! (^_^)v Only thing to worry about now is gas money.... (O_o) Also...while on my way back home (Lemoore) to pick up my car, I had an epiphany...I really do feel empty, alone, and isolated (but it's not that I am completely empty, alone, and isolated...just feeling that way...)....and it just hit me a couple of hours ago... Anyway, I wrote something with that couple hours ago (during my epiphany) on the back of a paper I printed out, and immah type it here: Single Again, and although I feel empty, alone, and isolated, I know I am gonna be okay. It really isn't the materialistic things that will make my life happier, but the richter things in life that make it worthwhile. I am gonna have fun when it is given to me, be responsible when life needs me to be, and overcome obstacles with what life throws at me. I never expected to get myself into all of this mess, however, life is testing me and giving me the experiences that make me grow. All I need now is to find my passion, stick to it as my career, and flourish in my life to find that ultimate happiness. As my pen ceases with lack of ink, I can only hope that oafter my quarrels, worries, obstacles, and life experience all level out, I can find my true wants and needs. That's basically how I feel....and yeah....Happy Easter Everyone! PS - I will post up pics of my car soon...it's of my very first car, and I'm soo happy to have it back! <3<3<3> (^_^)/) |
[04 Apr 2007 | Wednesday]
| 6:55 PM - Would it be safe to say it.... Would it be safe to say Love's not here It hurts, you know This poem isn't safe Yes, I said it, okay Feeling this way Now after lusting over clit Maybe not soon, but hopefully one day .... All figuratively inside, of course, ya know |
[28 Mar 2007 | Wednesday]
| 5:37 AM - All the quotes I could find...and this novel is it... With everything I have in me....my pride and dignity...I am letting go.. It's funny how you can looking from the outside of that glass window and find out that the happiness you see inside this box called a house delivers the message that everything is okay...but...nothing is as it seems...and I guess my rose colored glasses were put on too soon...but hey...better to have loved than never loved at all, right? I must think outside the box, forgive or forget, let wounds heal, stop thinking it's all about me, and move on.... The song I just heard in my head is a wonderful one..."Dear Mr. President" by Pink....Made me think about more than just myself today....and flooded tears to my eyes...Only cause I was watching the season finale of The L Word that I had come across this song....It made me look at more than just what was happening in my life and look at what is happening in the world.... In comparison....my life is very trivial to the world that has soo much suffering today...as much as I am hurt by this past week and a half, I know that there are more things to worry about than just the love life I seek... You gotta listen to these words...I was crying and knew that I could make a difference...by doing greater things in the world than only justifying my own life...my philosophies aren't completely abandoned, I suppose....and I only hope that I can share the wealth of what positivity I have towards a better world... Live life to the fullest and you can discover great things... |
touched
[27 Mar 2007 | Tuesday]
| 7:32 PM - Knowing when to let go.... It's sad to have someone in your life toy with your feelings....but finding out that two people within the same week have done that?? There is a whole bunch going through my mind... There is something about wanting something soo much and not being able to have it... Friendships is all I do hope for...from CG and Emily As sad as I may want it to be....friends is ultimately what I want from them.... Love will become the death of me... There isn't much more to say except that I will be entirely cut off from society and the "love world"... Whenever that will be, I know that I can find time to sort my shit out before I handle anyone else's... It sucks knowing that I really am obsessing over two friendships that probably should've ended a whole long time ago...or never even started.... My life is gonna be a lonely one from now on.... |
crushed
[20 Mar 2007 | Tuesday]
| 6:22 PM - The novel starts... Here we are now in a place...where the sun blends in...this feels funny...I don't even know what to say...just smile... Can't wait for this next day to be here..."early" as it may be...and I'll remember to make things skinnier...eat my chili cheese fries...keep things more penguin...I learned that just tonight...and make sure to trust again...in myself and others...maybe everyone out there should trust just a little...in yourself and with others...and all will be a brighter day...and YOU, reading this, should too.. So thank you to those who have made my past few days and the last week happier...."thank you, my friend" <=For all my friends... I am making it through my days...and I know I'll be okay...All these past few days made me think about life and how much I thought about things and that they are looking up...I don't wanna let myself down...and know what I want to keep my passions and ambitions driven... I am torn to do what I have to... But I am moving on...I just realized that I got a happy, enlightened life now...and it just got happier.. |
[18 Mar 2007 | Sunday]
| 1:07 PM - My days aren't over...and I've still got things to do... My mind has been going through emotions...but still no tears have surfaced...but I know I broke down inside...just a little...here's a story to explain... Sooo as I woke up this morning...and the funny thing is, when I got up to see if there was any sun...there was NO FUCKIN SUN....GRRR....when it finally happens to be a time to have a great time "Sunny" time, there's no sun....I guess no swimming for us girls....but yeah, anyway.... I got worried earlier that my sorority sisters might have left without calling to pick me up to go to the beach...so I had been texting and trying to get a hold of one of my sisters....I finally got a hold of Lisa R. and then tried waiting for Daisy's phone call....she finally started calling me, and I was more relieved because in a way I really didn't want to be spending much time on my computer...oh god..I think I am getting obsessed with MySpace again...aghh...lol...... Anyway, as my original plan was to spend the day with CG, unfortunately, that really didn't pan out...so after leaving to go home, I got to realize it wasn't too late to try and get a hold of Daisy so that I could get a ride out to the Beach....and so well we all were trying to find "the nearest beach" when we were in the F parking lot on Campus...and I kept wanting us to go to "Huntington Beach"....but Lisa kept saying that it was too far....omg, considering what happened and knowing all too well where we would end up going....and yep...after a phone call, Jasmin said were I'd most dread...."Santa Monica Pier".....soo we went, got lost trying to find a place to park....(in Santa Monica Place next to Sears, no doubt...heh...) and found parking...I really had fun!! I got to eat with my Co-Sis and my lil anchor....that was fun talking to you guys...on the way over....plus I had fun trying to get into a cinnamon roll.....LMAO....that was hilarious...Jessica, you know I love ya, but damn...you just crack me up sometimes....I especially liked it when we all played truth or dare...and Shelia...if you want a more better version of that thing with that one ex (before CG) and me, I'll tell ya too...and when we all ended up just bonding and talking on the beach....it really got me to thinking about how much life can throw people sideways and that a repetative circle forms...and Sisters must still talk it out...and face the fact that life still will have thorns to their roses....even though on the way over I knew i was going to be in the vicinity of Sears....I guess I would just try my best not to remind myself of things..."I think we should go to Sears!"....uh, yeah, thanks...but NO...lol....ya know I love ya Sheila.... And yea....I know that I must move on....and I found that even while me and my sisters were in the area....I know I am hurtin' a little, but I guess I just had to face the fact that I gotta work on myself first...and I can't let more of me break down....Never Again...no, I'm not going back to that dark place again...So I made myself understand that I don't want to hurt anyone or get involved...and through my attempted talk last night...I kept going through my mind that I want to let them know that I won't bother them and that it's over, CG...as much as I probably wanted to "compete for love," I ultimately knew it wasn't in my place...I knew that we were friends and I just needed to know that I don't need to be in the place of drama...and considering that I knew that I was involved and I made Emily cry, I couldn't stand making a situation worse...so I made it clear and tried to understand where CG was coming from and then left it at that...bringing myself to closure... So I got home about 4:30-5pm...and I'm checking to see if anything that Emily or CG would have checked my MySpace...and sure enough they were on...but neither of them msged me...so in my mind, I figured that the most reasonable explaination would be that I'm still not a happy subject to talk about between those two....too bad...I am a pretty cool person to get to know...(^_^)... But yeah...I put my mind to sleep and actually slept, so that I wouldn't overthink a situation and say "yeah, they must hate me or think I'm crazy"...kinda thing....and then, until 9:00pm, I woke up figured that I would attempt to make amends...in my "Ferlyn" ways....and try and add Emily so that I could talk to her....but for those of you who know who I am, I really don't like knowing that I am someone who one can hate....how is that possible?? Most people LOVE me and my quirky, unique and weird ways...my Ferlynish ways of loving! LMAO....I gotta laugh because when I actually said "Ferlynish" out loud, right now...it came out like "Finnish" with a weird moan....Lol....I crack myself up sometimes.... Anyway, yeah....so I'm also glad that my friend Mari is coming to pick me up and get me to go to this punk band somewhere in Eagle Rock All Star Lanes...wherever that is...and yeah...I guess I could express my feelings to friends whom I can trust will just listen...and who I can have fun with.... Obviously this weekend was full of surprises...and I only hope that I get the position tomorrow morning for my Interview as a Dance Instructor!! YAY! If there's anything I should actually be thinkin' about.....it should be that....cause it's my Career....I'm getting the opportunity to teach kids/adults my Styles of Hip Hop, breakin', tap, jazz, modern, and all the other things that make my dances appealing...I can't wait...and maybe tonight at the concert I can try making some moves to some of their songs....yeah, I think I will like that.....and I finally get to meet Mari's friend Jamie....who she's always talking about...she must be pretty cool...so that's where I'll be in a couple of minutes, and yeah.... Got lots to do, and so little time, I only hope I can get an outfit together too..and go to sleep early enough and get some rest, shower in the morning, get to the bus stop, and go to Pasadena for my interview...so Everyone Wish me Good Luck! But that's basically all the jist of it...soo now, I should get ready to go to the rock concert...maybe I'll wear baggy jeans and big ass t-shirt and "butchy" clothing just to instill some anger in CG....knowing well that she doesn't like my sense of fashion...lol....j/k...anyway....yeah I really do gotta change....Laters..everyone feel freely to comment...it's not like I'm gonna try to be defensive or get mad or anything like that....I just like to know that my readers are there to understand me more...cause I haven't learned the natural, or conventional ways of socializing...I mean...there is always a way to talk things out, right?? Call me Cg, Emily...and Mari (let me know when you are here...)...and anyone...I like talking and making up philosophies...okie dokie?? |
[11 Mar 2007 | Sunday]
| 2:54 PM - Ring in my Birthday.....with a flop.... I'm still bound on my recent relationship....except we're not together... But where do I draw the line when it comes to being close friends?? I messed it up.....and now I wanna take it all back... She explains to me that her life needs to be sorted out too...so I should give her that free time to take those breathers.... Where should I be...doin' my own thing....and not worry about this?? She moves me and has changed me like no other person has....I guess I must sacrafice a little bit and stop worrying about the relationship and actually work on making myself better.... I do have things that I need to get out of the way...and yeah.....I should just get that outta my way so I can finally have time to cry myself to sleep knowing that I'm hurting from messing up things.... That is what I do...I pity myself into sleep..... I've been in insomnia for the past few weeks....haven't been eating much due to lack of funds....not feeling anything but isolation....and gaurding myself from others....leaving myself to only cry into submission and sleep.... I only have $5 to my name....and I can only use that for my bus fare or food... When will I ever get a fucking break from all the madness and just get to live life???? Maybe I should just end it all? or maybe not? or maybe just stop my madness and get better? get some therapy? resolve EVERYTHING finally?? maybe...maybe....maybe...maybe...and yes.... There is lots going on...and I don't know where to start... I guess I won't be hanging out much...even on my birthday...will I want everyone here?? I have no clue....I just know there is things I need to do ASAP to put my life back together again... I'm coming for you (C.G.).....when the time comes...I wanna be better....have a car....have money.....have food.....have time for you...and in hopes when that time comes....you will too..... |
gloomy
[21 Feb 2007 | Wednesday]
| 4:31 PM - Things just can't get any worse... Soo....as I feel that things can't get any worse.... I just made myself break up with my girlfriend...I wanted things to be okay...and we finally had time to be together...we made time...And I just fucked it up with all the things that I had thought about...things were even going okay...I suppose...I only hoped that I would be okay...except she got busy...and I should have given her more time to sort things out....before I opened up my mouth...I don't even know if she'll wanna be with me anymore... I can't be lovers and friends...I just can't...I don't like that gray area... Please know that I only want what's best for us...I want you to know that... Even though I miss you and I want you in my life....I can't help but think that I'm getting in the way of everything that you got going for you.... I hope you understand... If you can handle me still being in your life...or you think that there shouldn't be anything to worry about...let me know....I still wanna be a part of your life, you know... NOT ONLY THAT... I have to find $900 by the end of this month... For Rent (for February)...$475 Should I throw a "Rent" party?? Any other ideas that anyone knows that can help me get through this? If anyone knows...let ME KNOW!! I am posting papers all around campus for Piano and Dancing!! |
[14 Feb 2007 | Wednesday]
| 8:33 PM - Someone STOLE my Backpack! It sucks that just about an hour ago my shit got stolen out of my friend's car... AGH!!!! Why?!?!?! I had all my stuff... My goodness.... I worry more about the paperwork than I do about my MP3 player....which probably costs more than the stuff inside of it....but still....now I have to get more of my signatures all over again...and get new copies of everything that I lost....it sucks but nothing of much value was stolen...because... If that someone tried to use my SSN from my award letter....they'd find out that I have bad credit...sucks for you DUMBASS!! If that someone tried to sign off for my Car....they'd find it in the impound lot...at the sheriff's office...plus...all the tickets that came with it...sucks for you DUMBASS!!! If that someone wanted to use the MP3 player...BEWARE...I have the serial number...and the receipts and sent it all to the police...you can't sell that shit....unless you use it....plus....if you do....you'll definitely get a HEX on your ASS....sucks for you DUMBASS!!! Your Karma will hit you tenfold!!! No joke... I'm pissed that all my life's work is in that fuckin' bag....and all my fuckin' syllabi for my classes....even my freakin' homework.....everything that I need that will be of use to me was in that bag....to get back on my feet....now I don't have it....WTF!!?!?!?!? *Sighs* I guess Shit will hit you like a ton of bricks...till you hit the floor and realize that you needed to wake up and look at life more better... Good life, here I come!!! (^_^')/) |
[06 Feb 2007 | Tuesday]
| 10:28 AM - For the love that opened my eyes... For you, I feel myself open up to you I opened myself up to you I know that something is going on Why I hug so much When ambition brought me into Los Angeles Would you still want me? Much of my life I wanted to change If I get scared
Ferlyn |
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